(Original Song by BIZZYNICCI)
Lyrics
I started this like a warning
Low light, no witnesses
Counting the seconds between your words
Like they were loaded
Like they’d go off if I moved wrong
There was a version of me
Who believed tone meant intention
Who thought eye contact was honesty
Who thought staying still
Was the same as staying safe
Then something cracked sideways
Not loud—worse
Quiet like realizing
You’ve been holding your breath
For years
And no one noticed
I got mean in my head
Before I ever said a word
Rehearsed the exits
Burned the maps
Left the windows open
Just in case
You were all gravity then
Pulling, insisting
Calling it concern
Calling it love
Calling it anything
That kept me close
I started lying with facts
Started telling the truth
In pieces
Learned how to survive
By being technically honest
And emotionally gone
Somewhere in there
I stopped sounding like myself
My voice flattened out
Like a letter read too many times
Like a song played too quietly
To recognize
You asked what changed
I almost laughed
Change implies movement
I was still
I was buried
Then one night it came back fast
Heat in my chest
Hands shaking
Anger sharp enough
To finally cut through
All the patience I’d been hoarding
I said nothing
But everything rearranged
I saw you clearly
For the first time
And didn’t feel the urge
To fix it
Now I speak slower
On purpose
Leave gaps in my sentences
Let people reveal themselves
In the space I don’t fill
I don’t explain the past anymore
It doesn’t need defending
I don’t sharpen the truth
I let it sit there
Untouched
Unapologetic
If this sounds colder
It’s because it’s finished
If this sounds calm
It’s because it’s decided
I didn’t grow thicker skin
I grew boundaries
I didn’t lose softness
I relocated it
And whatever version of me
You remember best
She’s real
She just doesn’t live here anymore